Rules for Being Human

Rules For Being Human
You will receive a body.
You may like it or hate it,
but it's yours to keep
for the entire period.

You will learn lessons.
You are enrolled in a full-time,
informal school called life.

There are no mistakes, only lessons.
Growth is a process of trial, error
and experimentation.


The "failed" experiments are as much
a part of the process as the experiments
that ultimately "work".

Lessons are repeated until they are learned.
A lesson will be presented to you in various forms
until you have learned it.
When you have learned it,
you can go on to the next lesson.

Learning lessons does not end.
There is no part of life that doesn't
contain it's lessons.
If you're alive,
there are still lessons to be learned.

"There" is no better than "here".
When your "there" has become "here",
you will simply obtain another "there"
that will again look better than "here".

Other people are merely mirrors of you.
You can not love or hate something
about another person unless it reflects to you
something you love or hate about yourself.

What you make of your life is up to you.
You have all the tools and resources you need.
What you do with them is up to you.

The choice is yours.

by Dr. Cherie Carter-Scott

Brent

Dear Brent:

You are growing up so fast. When you turned twelve on September 26th, I felt as if those twelve years were just like a dream. You are on the cusp of being a teen. I want to let you know my hopes and dreams for you. I love you Brent, as each day passes my love for you grows stronger. I am proud of you, just as you are. I accept you as you are, my beloved son.

I wish for you a life of spiritual abundance. I wish for you to pay attention to your dreams. Your dreams deserve your attention. Believe in yourself. I wish for you to know that even though today may not be ideal you will climb to incredible heights. Don't give up on yourself.

I see you with a sad face and your eyes look far away, sometimes it seems you are unreachable. I know you have seen and heard things that have broken your heart. I know your sensitive heart has felt sadness and worry beyond your years. Take courage, Brent. You may feel that I have not done enough to make your path easier. Sometimes my hands are tied, my pleas for help for you fall to deaf ears.

You have lost your innocence by watching your father and I go through a very difficult divorce. I pray to God that your will have strength and courage. Life isn't always fair and just. I pray that your struggles will produce a man who has incredible compassion, empathy and love for yourself and others. I believe this will happen to you.

I believe in you.

Who Lied to You?

Who pursuaded your heart to let go of it's dreams?
Who tempted you into a world of trudging along
without aspirations. You then began to believe that your life
didn't really matter.

Who laughed in your face when you shared your passions?
You let your dreams die at your feet. No memorials, no tributes, no rememberance. Your dreams died and a part of you went a long with your dreams. Buried on a cold, dark night. You held your blanket to your chin, your pillow wet with your tears. You buried your dreams as you took refuge in your bed, you bid them farewell.

Who shamed you into believing you are worthless, a disgrace and of no value?
And now you walk with your head slung low, your eyes not daring to look to the wonders of a new horizon. Who snatched away your joy?

I'm telling you now that those are lies that were shoved into your heart. Start the escavation today and dig those lies out. Let your heart let go of the lies that have been buried and then grew larger each and every day.

I'm telling you to write down a new set of beliefs for yourself based on love, compassion and empathy. I'm telling you to write a brand new page. Today you write the words for the screen play starring You. Today, you cast the players in your life. Today, you are the director, author, the producer.

God didn't make a mistake when you were brought into this world. You are a miracle, you are a blessing.

Altruism....Be Blessed and Give Blessings

When we focus on the negativity in the world, we are not able to take a pro-active stance. Let your eyes open to the goodness that exists in the world. There is peace that exists when we choose it. Be inspired, be uplifted, be blessed and be grateful!


Soulumination
http://soulumination.org/home.html


"Soulumination, founded by Lynette Huffman Johnson, celebrates the lives of children facing life threatening illnesses by providing professional photographs—free of charge—of these children and their families. The life-affirming photographs of Soulumination are an enduring, positive record of the child’s brief life. Current efforts center on continuing to provide services to the families requesting our services and supporting exhibits of the Soulumination Collection."


International Volunteer Day

International Volunteer Day is December 5th. This day is held and celebrated to honor those who spend volunteer hours and efforts across the world.


The official website of IVD is World Volunteer Web: http://www.worldvolunteerweb.org


Peacejam
http://www.peacejam.org/

Thi website is a gathering place for an international education program built around leading Nobel Peace Laureates who work personally with youth to pass on the spirit, skills, and wisdom they embody.

The Online Volunteering website tells many stories of how volunteering has impacted the lives of many in a positive way both for the volunteers and the ones who are being lifted up
http://www.onlinevolunteering.org


Oneworld
www.oneworld.ca is a great central website location for getting involved, education or receiving positive energy about the growth that is being done.


I found a website that is both peaceful and serene.

You light a 'virtual' candle in memory of someone, as a gesture of gratitude or hope.
You simply click on begin and click on an unlit candle and follow the directions.

http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?l=eng


How You Can Change the World
An altruistic website on changing the world.

http://www.howyoucanchangetheworld.com/alt.htm

love love love

You are stronger than you have yourself believe. You get stronger with every obstacle you encounter.

Please promise yourself you will not allow negativity to cast a shadow on your day.

I encourage you to seek out people who lift you up so you can get a better view.

I wish for you to believe the world is a more marvelous place just because you exist.

I want for you to handle your dreams with the upmost respect. Nurture them always.

Your life story, has the most perfect leading character; YOU. Believe in your story, your truth.

Let Go and Let God.

Accept the beautiful and wonderous mysteries in life. With grace, welcome life's mysteries.

Be grateful....if even for your breath, if even for the sun, the rain or the caress of the wind. Be grateful, it will move you on the right path.

Love yourself like 'nobody's business'. You deserve to love yourself unconditionally.

Thanksgiving

I spent Thanksgiving at my sister's house. It was very comforting to be with family. I had been going through a rough period of time and needed to see a room full of warmth, tenderness and welcoming.

We went around the table and spoke about what we were thankful for. I was in a real funk because of my ex husband's need to pull me down. I wasn't going to follow suit. I took a stand to not be brought down to those depths. The tugs and pulls to bring me down were wearing me down.

I know with everything I believe that it is best to be proactive and give thanks, every day. On Thanksgiving, I just had a difficult time, remembering what I was grateful for.

When it was my time to speak about what I was grateful for I stood up and grabbed my elastic waisted billowy skirt and told my family I was thankful for a loose fitting skirt for the feast! Everyone else gave thoughtful answers and spoke with their heart. I wasn't feeling it on that day.

I've had some time to reflect on what I was thankful for. Here is my list from the heart. ♥

I am thankful I have faith in God. This truly gives me strength and courage. I feel blessed that I have been given this journey. God answers when I pray and for that I'm thankful. Some prayers aren't answered the way that I want them to be answered and I'll leave that as a mystery. For now, I am thankful God gives me peace.

I am thankful for my mother who truly loves me and will take a call from me at any hour night or day. She believes in me and her prayers give me strength. She brings my focus back and rallies for everything my heart desires. I love you Mom for being my biggest cheerleader!

I am thankful for my husband who helps me to set my sails when life is turbulent. He doesn't let me give up, ever. At times, I just want to give up, give in and he never allows me to stay still. I must keep going and he pushes me. Mike, we are going through this journey together and I am grateful you are by my side. I love you.

I am thankful for my sons. It is such a tragedy that my ex husband wants to control their love for me and my love for them. He doesn't realize that love can't be possessed. My love for them will never be diminished or controlled. I bore my sons and gave new life to myself. I thank my sons for showing me how deeply I can love. I love you Brent and Jimmy, you are both my reasons. My sons, I would tear a mountain apart stone by stone to get to you. I would sacrifice everything I have to provide you with peace and contentment. You have my love, forever.

I am thankful for my sisters who know my story. I don't have to explain. I am understood and accepted. I love you both for being outstanding characters in my life story. Through the good, bad and ugly, we will always be family. Your sons and daughters have provided me with love and laughter. They are my blessings and my pride! I love you Maureen and Val

I am thankful for my friends who scold me when necessary and love me always. I believe it is a testimony to my own wisdom that I chose such loving, caring, warm, courageous women as friends. I have friends who belly laugh with me because that's sometimes what is necessary. We heal from our belly laughs and inside jokes. Even though our lives are busy we are connected spiritually and emotionally. I love you my friends, my heart is speaking to Tina, Liette and Angie.

I will continue this post after some much needed sleep...to be continued because my heart is full of thanks today!

You really Can Fly

"Never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be."
Clementine Paddleford

I wanted to write these words with my nieces in mind who are leaving their teen years behind and becoming beautiful, smart, courageous women!


Before settling down in a relationship, a young woman should consider education. That's something no one can take from you. An education will be what you own, it is an accomplishment that will give you a concrete advantage.

Find a mentor (–noun 1. a wise and trusted counselor or teacher.
2. an influential senior sponsor or supporter.)

A mentor will enable you to ask questions about a field you are looking to go into. Mentors can provide you with encouragement and inspiration. You will find a mentor will be a positive role model in living. Ask your college about mentoring programs or take the initiative and ask an woman whose life you admire to mentor you. Don't worry, chances are the woman you ask to mentor you will be very flattered.

Consider volunteering once in awhile. Volunteering can give you valuable transferable skills that you can carry over to an amazing career. Most people say that "You can't get a job without experience and you can't get experience without a job". With volunteering you can get that experience. It is a fantastic way to network. You may be able to get a starting job in the field you are interested in by volunteering! Volunteering is so incredible because it teaches you what 100 books can't teach you; emotional intelligence. Volunteering gives such a feeling of goodness to the volunteer, because it comes from the heart.

Friendships in college can last a life time. Learn how to give and take. Encourage one another, build each other up. Break away from 'friends' who bring you down. Don't let negativity to infiltrate your heart. Believe in yourself and your potential today and in all the tomorrows ahead. Travel with friends, those memories will always keep you warm on a cold winters night.

Live on your own and then you know you can always depend on yourself. Each time you learn how to deal with situations like a broken toilet, noisy, obnoxious neighbors and paying the rent you become more confident.

I believe that a woman learns a valuable lesson when she recognizes she is feeling weak and needs the support from others. We can't always be strong, sometimes we need others to steady us and to help us to realize our value!!!!

Travel light in this world. Don't weigh yourself down with too many possessions. It will only make you feel cumbersome. Traveling light also means letting go of guilt over past mistakes. Learn to forgive yourself and let it go. So called 'mistakes' are actually valuable lessons.

Learn to be assertive this is different than aggressiveness. Assertiveness means to stand up for yourself with confidence. Aggressiveness means to act with hostility. Respect yourself to be able to stand for what you need and want. You can become resentful, anxious and frustrated by not being assertive in your life. Your confidence and self esteem will increase by being assertive. Remember, assertive isn't a bad word! Learn to say NO when necessary, it will bring balance and peace into your life.

I want to part with these words....happiness isn't some mysterious place in the future it is a choice you make right now. Attitude is everything in life, you can't control everything, you do have control over your attitude. You are beautiful and you deserve happiness, own it, now.



"Those Who Stand For Nothing, Fall For Anything" - Malcolm X

I've been tagged by http://charitychildsgevero.blogspot.com/

I've been 'tagged' by Charity Joy Bell from http://charitychildsgevero.blogspot.com/
Please visit her blog, she has a very lovely blog. Since I've worked a 36 hour weekend this calls for a light blog entry!

1. Where is your cell phone?
- I don't own one, my last two accidently broke.

2.Your hair?
- various shades of red, not all natural because I've had to battle gray haired nuisances!

3. Your mother?
-Joan, she is beloved and my heroine. She lives in Ontario and I miss her dearly

4. Your father?
-is a mystery to me. The last I have heard he lives in British Columbia.

5. Your favorite food?
-Sushi, because it leaves me feeling nourished not laden down with heaviness

6. Your dream last night?
-I was on the survivor reality show and I had very, very bushy eyebrows. I was very ashamed of my bushy unibrow in my strange dream.

7. Your favorite drink?
- oolong tea

8. Your dream/goal?
-to be a strong community advocate for positive change.

9. What room are you in?
-the living room next to the patio doors

10. Your hobby?
- learning and sharing

11. Your fear?
- my son's lives. I want so much goodness for them

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years?
- wiser than I am today

13. Where were you last night?
-at a meeting for volunteers for a grassroots group called 'Circle of Support', for people leaving prison. Exciting!

14. Something you aren't?
-judgemental or hateful

15. Muffins?
-I love muffins, especially morning glory muffins from the Fair Trade Cafe

16. Wish list item?
-A vacation to an all exclusive beach resort. I know, I said I never wanted to do that resort vacation deal. I just have to swim with dolphins before I die!

17. Where did you grow up?
-Brampton, Ontario and Pubnico, Nova Scotia

18. Last thing you did?
-I woke up after a restfull, peaceful sleep

19. What are you wearing?
-t-shirt and a green fuzzy blanket

20. Your TV?
-doesn't get turned on, no cable, by choice

21. Your pets?
-2 cats, Nicks and Prudence

22. Your friends?
-I miss spending days with friends, long interrupted days

23. Your life?
-should really be in book form or a made for TV movie, never a dull moment!

24. Your mood?
-reflective mood

25. Missing someone?
-I achingly miss my sons. My heart is broken

26. Vehicle?
-Santa Fe

27. Something you're not wearing?
-i'm not wearing any other jewlerry besides my wedding ring.

28. Your favorite store?
- For Clothing Pretty Things Boutique http://www.prettythingsboutique.com/
For Everything else Winners or any second hand store

29. Your favorite color?
-definitely orange (did you look at some of my wedding pictures?)

30. When was the last time you laughed?
-Last night when trying to find the room for the information session on volunteering I walked in and sat down in an AA meeting!

31. Last time you cried?
-Last weekend, crying over my sons

32. Your best friend?
-knows me too well, thats why we will never part ways!

33. One place that I go over and over?
-in my mind, over and over; memories

34. One person who emails me regularly?
-my darling mom, without fail!

35. Favorite place to eat?
-Dharma Sushi http://www.dharmasushi.com/

well, this was fun! I will post a blog I've been working on this morning later on tonight.

til then peace be with you and "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Plato

Being Silly

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
Dr. Seuss

“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life's realities.”
Dr. Seuss

“There a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” Ecclesiastes 3:4

Have you ever rolled out of bed, painfully stubbed your toe and then the whole day seemed to have gone down hill from there? The toe incident led to you then yelping in pain, blaming someone for leaving something on the floor and the cat in your path runs away in fear of your wrath. Its so natural to let a small misstep like this cause your whole day to go awry.

Imagine not letting that stubbed toe send your day in a tizzy. I don't want to let my stumbles send me in frazzled state which will in turn bring on the dark clouds to dampen my spirits. Oh, and pity those around me when those dark clouds are following me!

I want to lighten up and even be silly and nonsensical. I want to practice silly and fun in my life so those stumbles and tumbles don't keep me down. Manditory silliness is in order!

I remember being a child and my cousins and I would have laughing marathons. These marathons were especially fun while eating jello for dessert because laughing was frowned upon by my stern father. It was fun because we were trying not to laugh which made us laugh even harder! We probably didn't know what we were laughing at, we laughed because it was fun.

I think back to school photos when I dressed in a purple flowered frilly frock. It's funny how we blame our mother for her horrid taste in our apparel. I think as kids, we just didn't really care. My childhood ensembles could consist of striped knee socks, tap shoes, a flowery top and a cape. (I went to dance class as a kid and had a cape from my performance in 'Pink Panther'). I didn't take the opportunity to think of how others would judge my duds. I was happy and it was all good!

I remember spinning around in circles until I fell down in a dizzy state onto the grass and watched the fluffy clouds looking for 'cloud animals'. I remember licking the bowl and the plastic spoon, savoring the chocolate; such bliss!

Balance is so essential in life, and many of us are off balance. We need to spend more time being silly and having fun. Many times I've heard of our inner child. I think we are children in adult's skin. We may now have the wrinkles, age spots, saggy skin, stretch marks and scars (oh, but not YOUdear reader, I don't mean you in particular), but we are children I believe just underneath the surface.

Your assignment for tomorrow....and the next day and so on....

I want you to play some mean air guitar, rock out! Play some music from your teen years, crank it up a bit and dance until you are breathless. Wear a clown nose and look in the mirror, just try not to laugh now, its pretty much impossible! Wear your rainbow striped socks under your 'business' pants, it will be your 'dirty little secret'! Get out your childhood board games instead of reading the business journal.

Have fun and be silly, after all laughter is the best medicine. I watched the movie Patch Adams for the first time not long ago. I highly recommend the movie which is based on a true story of a doctor who lived was very passionate about perscribing medicine for his patients.



“We do not stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing!” Benjamin Franklin

Words of Love

Words written and read by my husband at our wedding....


It was early may 2006. I sat alone in the early morning hours at Sainte Anne as a security guard. That night I listened to cbc late night radio. A woman was singing beautiful songs in Sanskrit. One of the most ancient languages.

The announcer translated her words and as I listened to what she said I felt a strange feeling come over me. It was as if the words the woman sang and the message she sending out was about someone who was going to be coming into my life. She said, “ do not judge me, for my clothes are tattered and I have travelled the world and lost many battles but I am here now, I stand by you and I sing this song of love to you.”

The beauty of those words rang deep inside me. I still think about it to this day. That morning I told my co-worker and friend that I hoped to find love soon and I asked him to pray for me. The next week in Barrington after a G-strung gig, we met. My prayers were answered and so the journey began. Vicki you have been through so much and you have such strength. I admire and respect you for that. As in that song the woman sang, I will not judge you. I am proud of you.

As the lotus rises on its stalk unsoiled by the mud and the water that is grows in, so the wise one speaks of peace and is unstained by the opinions of the world….or something along those lines eh

You have accomplished so many great things and still have so many more great things to do and lives to touch. Vicki we have had our share of ups and downs. WE have been through a lot together. Our clothes have been tattered and battles lost. But we won the most important battle of all. We found each other and we have given each other love.

Victorine I vow to always be beside you, without judgment, without fear. Your dreams I share with you and you share mine. I promise to do my best to be a good influence for the boys.

Brent I promise to always tell you how special you are to listen to you when you need a friend to bring you camping and do outdoors things and most importantly to buy you beef jerky and dry fish all the time.

Jimmy I promise to let you sing your songs and bang drums or play guitars cranked up to 11 if you want, to always make you laugh by repeating silly things over and over again and most importantly give you lots of cuddles.

AS cheesy as this may sound, Love really does prevail. No one will take that away from us. Into the great wide open we go. What a marvel it wll be to see all the things that we will be (our family) because of you and me. I love you.

"Take These Broken Wings and Learn to Fly....." Beatles

I'm shaking the dust off my blog and bringing it new life! I surely did miss blogging. I missed the outpouring of my words to others. I hope my words bring a little bit 'o' joy to your day! I missed your words of encouragement and light.


I have experienced wonderful and lovely experiences that I haven't shared with you yet. I have chosen to accept what I can't change and have the courage to grow. I want to grow beyond my expectations. I will in fact shatter any expectations I have and let faith be my guide.

I married my love on August 8, 2009. It was an lovely sunny day by the sea. With faith we said our vows on the steps of a gazebo with the sea lightly rolling in on the shore in the background.

My youngest son, Jimmy walked me down the imaginary aisle and my older son Brent, stood with the men as the best man. Jimmy and I walked to the gazebo for the ceremony with Bob Marley playing, "Is this Love".

I wore an orange and white dress. I bought my ring from a second hand store. My husband's ring was his father's ring. His father passed away on December 29, 2007. The ring was enlarged for him and still bares the scratches from his father's work as a labourer.

The invitations were fashioned as concert tickets. The cake was shaped like a vinyl record and the cupcakes had little frosting guitar picks and music notes. I took vinyl records and softened them in the oven to make bowls to place the clown noses in for the guests to wear! It was a fun, original wedding that was planned with gusto and ebullience!

Since pictures will really tell the story, I shall share them with you!

I've Returned.....

I may have simply ran out of words....I am back again and will write for those who drop in to my blog...Have a blessed day :)


life is good ♥